i live in what you might call a modern city. there is no space for anything but ads and shopping malls. there is only one resounding message in every space imaginable…BUY MORE. The billboards scream at you. Brands, brands, brands, promising you that you’ll somehow be a better person if you buy their fucking product. you probably already know this, but it actually won’t.
LCDs are everywhere, displaying seizure inducing ads for products for which the need arose because we were living an unhealthy lifestyle in the city. face cream. mens and womens’ “health” salons. a rubber belt attached to a motor that vibrates your belly fat, promising that you won’t have to get off your lazy ass to look healthy.
this is pollution of the mind. nobody smiles on public transport.
i consume too much. i overeat. i don’t get outdoors as much as i want to. i eat more meat than’s good for the environment. i know that eating and buying local, green produce is better for myself and the world around me. but i don’t. it’s not convenient to do so.
i try to be a good person. i recycle when possible, avoid buying bottled water. bring my own bag with me as often as possible and say no when the cashier asks if i want a bag. i bike to work. drive less. is this enough? does this even matter at all on an universal scale?
i am sad. i am lonely. i spend on average at least 8 hours sitting down on weekdays. this is bad for me. i am 24 years old and i am overweight, not to the point of obesity but if i continue down the road that i’m on, it will probably end that way.
i think of myself as creative, but it seems that i am actually destructive. to myself, to the world around me. when i am sad i drink, smoke, laze around. this makes me more sad, so i repeat the cycle. consumption excites me. it seems to make me happy. for a while.
consumption will not make you happy. consumption is addictive. consumption will consume your soul, your life, your happiness. you will never be satisfied with the amount you have. it’s human nature.
we must consume when we have to. consumption itself isn’t inherently evil. it’s only evil when it’s done to excess.
starting from today i will eat until i’m satiated and no more. i’ll stop staying up late and snacking. i’ll sleep more. i’ll do more exercise.
let’s try to consume less together. eat and buy only what we need. resist the temptation to gorge yourself. my health, and your health are limited. if you’re fat and you look like this, there’s probably some unhappiness in your life. solve that unhappiness first. not trying to be preachy. it’s just what i will try to do.
when i’m unhappy i consume more to numb my pain. be careful of falling into this trap as i did. mind, soul and body are all connected. our bodies are telling us that there’s something terrible, something insidious in our souls that make us consume more than we need.
first we must heal our minds. you either have to be really self-disciplined or if you’re not and you absorb what’s around you, then you should probably go somewhere where the environment around you can heal you, passively. the latter is what i’m planning to do.
i will find a place where my soul can be free. a place that’s directly connected to the earth and nature. a place where we have space. somewhere i can focus on living and thinking. a place where people smile at each other instead of treat as an obstacles to get past. i will create music, love people, grow my own food and connect people together. instead of dying every day, i will be living every day.
on another note, I probably need to reformat this website a bit. stay tuned…